The Grasshopper Effect
by TwitchingHades
Summary: When Howard's cousin Colette, a girl fresh out of college, moves to town, she turns some lives upside-down. Join her in her adventure to find a job, make friends, and even possibly spark a new romance with an unlikely nerd. Raj/OC, some LeonardxPenny and other future cannon relationships.
1. Chapter 1

**So, what's this? A RajeshxFemOC story? Yeah, I totally went there! I've looked up, down, and all around for a RajOc story, but to no avail! So, I'm writing one myself. I did my best to keep everyone in character, but I'm lazy, and this story will revolve mostly around Raj, Howard, and my OC, with more Penny sprinkled in than Sheldon and Leonard (Is it just me or does that sound kinda sexual when I say it that way? =/ ). Anyway, I've got a few chapters already written out in advance. I'll try to update once a week (Probably on Sundays after this one). Let me know what you think, maybe this story will go for longer than just a few chapters!**

**p.s. Don't ask about the title. It's in progress, and I couldn't think of anything better at the moment. I reserve the right to alter it at any given moment. :B**

**Rated T for mild language and some slight sexual material later on.**

**I own nothing but my OC: Colette Luna Blumenburg**

**And, last but most definitely not least, if you see any typos or errors of any kind, please let me know. Thank you :3**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Colette stood in the airport, her large suitcase held tightly in her hands as she stood on her tip toes, scanning amongst the several heads in the airport. Although she stood at a measly 5'2", she quickly saw the familiar Wolowitz she sought, fighting her way through the crowd to the man. "Howie!" she called out cheerfully as she threw her arms around the man from behind, causing him to squeal in surprise.

"Colette, there you are!" he stated after he got over the initial shock, turning around to hug the girl in return. "You shouldn't sneak up on people like that."

Colette giggled quietly. "Sorry, but I'm just so good at it, I can't help it some times." She glanced over at the dark-skinned boy standing silently beside Howard as she parted from her cousin. "Hi, I'm Colette," she greeted, giving him a sweet smile as she held out her hand to him. The boy made a quiet, startled sound, a tinge of red visible on his face.

"Sorry, that's Raj," Howard introduced. "He can't talk around pretty girls. Raj, this is my cousin, Colette."

Colette let out a hum of acknowledgment as she stared at Raj, making him squirm in his spot. "A social anxiety disorder, huh?" She smiled brightly as she put her arm around Raj's shoulders. "I had the same problem back in high school. Don't worry, I know just how to cure you of that, Raj!"

"Shall I take your bag, m'lady?" Howard offered as he took the suitcase from her hands, nearly toppling over from the weight. Colette giggled and ruffled Howard's hair.

"Always such the gentleman, Howard. But, I don't think your scrawny arms can handle that bag. I pretty much packed my entire life in there, so it's pretty heavy. I can handle it, though." She went to grab it back, but was intercepted by Raj, who took the suitcase from Howard and whispered something into his ear.

"Shut up, you are so not stronger than me..!" Howard retorted, enticing another whisper into his ear. "No, dude, that's so messed up!" Raj pulled away, looking pleased with himself, while Howard looked flustered. "Whatever, good luck with that, you can't even talk to her!" He crossed his arms and walked toward the exit, leaving Colette next to a scowling Raj.

"What'd you say to him?" Colette asked curiously to the mute Indian, who just blushed and followed after Howard without a word. "Hey, c'mon, that's mean!" Colette called as she rushed after him. "You can't talk about someone right in front of them and not let them know what you said. That's so rude." She pouted up at Raj, who just kept walking, looking terribly uncomfortable. "Hm... That's okay. I'll just make you tell me later." With a triumphant smile, Colette skipped over to her cousin, who waited for her by his cab, completely oblivious to the look of despair that overcame Raj's face.

* * *

Colette stared at the apartment adds in the newspaper, several of the adds scribbled out. Her long, curly chestnut-colored hair was pulled up messily into a clip, her body adorned with a blue tank top and white capris. Her eye twitched as she heard the shrill scream of her aunt from the other room, soon followed by the equally annoying yell Howard returned. She loved her family dearly, and greatly appreciated them giving her a place to stay in her time of need, but she _needed_ to get out of this house before she went as insane as the other two tenants. When the doorbell rang, she jumped at the opportunity.

"I'll get it," she called, unheard over the yells of her other family members, as she rushed to the door, opening it to reveal Raj. "Oh, hello, Raj," she greeted cheerfully, slipping on her flip flops and stepping outside, closing the door behind her. "Would you like to take me away from the screeching of the Wolowitz family? We could go someplace fun, do you know any fun places?"

Raj let out a little squeaky sound and pointed uncomfortably at the door behind Colette.

"What, you don't wanna hang out with me?" Colette pouted, feigning hurt. "Do you really dislike me so much that you don't wanna hang out with me?"

Raj shook his head comically fast, his entire being trying to communicate that he did not feel that way. It made Colette smile at the endearing behavior.

"I know, I'm just messing with you," she said softly and ruffled the man's hair, having to reach up to do so. "You're just so cute when you're flustered, I can't help myself sometimes." She smiled up at him as he blushed and looked away embarrassedly. "I'll get Howard for you." With that she turned around, opened the door, and yelled at the top of her lungs: "Howard, your boyfriend is here!"

"He's not my boyfriend!" Howard yelled back as he rushed to the door. "And I would appreciate if you would stop addressing him as such." He glared down at Colette before walking passed the giggling girl to talk to Raj. "Hey, you here for Halo night? I assume you need a ride?" Raj nodded in reply before Howard turned back to Colette. "Alright, I'll be back later."

"No!" Colette exclaimed, rushing in front of Howard to keep him from leaving. "_Please_ don't leave me alone with your mom again, Howard. She made me scrub the boils on her feet last time." She shivers in disgust at the memory. "_Take me with you..!_"

"Well, there's only room for two people on my vespa," Howard stated, looking at Raj for help and just getting a silent shrug in response.

"We can take a cab!" Colette suggested. "I'll pay for it!"

The two boys shared a look before Howard gave in. "Alright, but... I warn you, my friends are..."

Raj whispered in Howard's ear, Colette leaning in to try to hear what he says.

"Yeah, mostly just Sheldon is unbearable," Howard agreed with his friend's whispered comment.

"I think I can handle your friends," Colette stated, hiding her disappointment at not hearing what Raj had said; what can she say? Something about mystery draws her in, and Raj was quite the puzzle to her. "Let's go!" She pulled out her cell phone, quickly dialing for a cab. "After I get the cab..."

* * *

"Man, someone really needs to fix that elevator," Colette complained as they made it to the fourth floor, practically wheezing for breath.

"Did you bring your inhaler, Colette?" Howard asked, turning to his cousin worriedly.

"Nah, I'll be fine," she breathed out as she leaned against a wall, her hands above her head.

Raj gave her a worried look as Howard knocked on the door, despite the fact that her breathing was quickly under her control again. She smiled reassuringly at the Indian man as the door opened, then followed her cousin inside the apartment.

"Who is this?" asked a high-pitched male voice in mild surprise.

"This is my cousin, Colette," Howard introduced quickly. "Colette, this is Sheldon and Leonard." He motioned to each man in turn.

Leonard waved a hand as he smiled a nerdy smile. "Hi, Colette."

"I didn't invite her to join us," Sheldon stated irritably, eying the girl over like she was a walking parasite. Colette winced slightly at the rude look, crossing her arms over her chest in an attempt to hide her insecurity. Raj walked around her, standing in front of her to whisper into Howard's ear. She actually caught what he said due to the close proximity.

"Tell him to shove it, she's hanging out with us whether or not he likes it," Raj whispered, making Colette smile and Howard chortle.

"Tell him yourself," Howard laughed, nudging his friend.

"Tell me what?" Sheldon demanded, turning his judging gaze to Raj.

Colette stood on the tips of her toes and rested her head on Raj's shoulder so she could see Sheldon, making the Indian boy blush brightly at the contact. "I'm just here to audit, don't mind me," she stated cheerfully before turning to whisper in Raj's ear. "Thank you, Raj.." She walked around the man and smiled at Sheldon. "Is that alright with you, Sheldon? I promise I'll be a good guest, cross my heart." She smiled cutely as she drew an X over her heart.

"Fine, but you're not messing up our teams," Sheldon stated as he walked over to his spot, grabbing his controller and sitting down. Howard went to his usual spot in the middle of the couch, Raj following but stopping short to motion for Colette to take his usual seat at the other end.

"Sit," Colette commanded, pushing him gently to sit down, and Raj complied with a frown. His frown quickly disappeared though as Colette sat in front of him on the floor and leaned her body against his legs, making the man blush at the physical contact.

"Let's get started already," Sheldon commanded irritably as he started the game and selected the teams.

The first round was quick, Raj and Howard getting annihilated by Sheldon and Leonard. The second round was not much better.

"Raj, get your head in the game!" Howard yelled after the said man lost them the second round. Raj whispered something in his ear. "Fine, then give your controller to her, maybe she'll do better."

"Excuse me," Sheldon intervened as Raj handed his controller to Colette, who looked rather surprised as she took the object. "We can't just switch team mates in the middle of a war."

"What, are you threatened by me, Sheldon?" Colette coaxed playfully. "Afraid I'm going to kick your ass?"

"Of course not, you're a girl!" Sheldon said, as though it was apparent she would lose because she was a female.

"Then, you've got nothing to worry about, right? It's not like I'm a threat or anything."

"Yeah, why not just let her play?" Howard asked. "I have no objections."

"Well, I suppose since the losing team doesn't mind losing more... Very well, you may play."

Colette smirked as Sheldon started the round, quickly refamiliarizing herself with the old controls. Before long, she was yelling out orders to Howard and had a killing spree going. Although her efforts were great, they were in vain, as her team lost regardless.

"Wow, you're good!" Howard exclaimed. "You know, it's not illegal for cousins to marry..."

Colette choked on nothing at that statement, followed by a coughing fit, which soon turned into a laughing fit.

"What's so funny?" Sheldon asked seriously. "She lost the match. Why is she laughing?"

"Howard.. Howard... We've had this discussion before," Colette reminded her cousin as her laughter died down. "Marrying family is way too awkward for me. Plus, I didn't grow up in Alabama."

"I could make it un-awkward," Howard said in his 'seductive' voice, just causing Colette to laugh again.

"No, I think you'd make it more awkward than any other cousin in the world could, Howard. Now, give Raj your controller, because we don't make a good team."

"What, but I still wanna play," Howard whined.

"Please, Howie?" Colette pleaded, looking back at her cousin with her puppy dog eyes, her head practically in Raj's lap at the movement. "Just one round, then you two can go back to your bromance team."

"Fine," Howard whined as he handed the controller to Raj, a smile tugging at his lips. "You know I can't say no to that face."

"Technically, you just did," Sheldon stated, making Colette laugh. "Why does she keep laughing?"

Raj whispered into Howard's ear.

"Because she doesn't have a stick lodged up her bum, like some people," Howard repeated insinuatingly, holding back a laugh of his own.

"Let's just continue to the next round," Sheldon ordered haughtily as he started it.

Between Raj and Colette, their team was unstoppable. Colette gave Raj a few instructions near the beginning of the match, but the man appeared to learn a lot quicker than Howard, so by the time they had annihilated half of the other team, they were both playing in silence, both knowing exactly what needed to be done in order to help the other. They ended up winning by a landslide. Sheldon stared at the screen in shock before turning to Leonard.

"This is your fault," he blamed his roommate, quickly sparking an argument between the two.

"Awesome job, Raj!" Colette exclaimed, launching herself up enough to give the man an awkward hug around his mid section.

"What is all this racket!?"

* * *

**Aaaand BOOM! A cliffhanger! Anyone wanna guess who the witch is that just interrupted this priceless, loud moment? Anyone? I'll give you a virtual cookie... Bah, I suck at cliffhangers, I'm sure everyone knows who it is... But guess anyway, cause I feed off of reviews like pedo-demons feed off the blood of innocent children! (Sorry, I watched Sinister recently :I)**

**Until next time, my lovely views!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Alright, a few followers.. This one's a bit short, so I might post the next one on Wednesday or so. And, (this next bit has nothing to do with the story but I feel the need to add it) after having to take a college English class, it feels good to break some rules of grammar. Like, not having to split up conjunctions when it's not in the quotations... or using the word "but" at the beginning of a sentence. Or using three dots in a row to signify a pause during speech! Hahaha, take that society! xD (I especially love the ability to write notes before and after each chapter. Thank you, FF, for giving us that much... I believe these are signs that I couldn't be a serious writer even if I wanted to... :B) Anyways...**

**Everything belongs to its respective owners, I do not own anything from the Big Bang Theory.**

**Enjoy! :3**

* * *

"What is all this racket?" a blond girl asked as she walked into the apartment, looking around at the scene in shock, her eyes landing particularly on the girl with her arms wrapped around Raj's waist

"Penny," Leonard said awkwardly, a sort of desperation in his voice. "Uh, just Halo night. You know how it can get sometimes."

"Right," Penny replied airily, her eyes fixed on Colette. "Hi, I'm Penny." She shot a smile at the brunette.

Colette blushed lightly and got to her feet, reaching her hand out to shake the Penny's, after returning her controller, of course. "I'm Colette, nice to meet you." She smiled a cute smile as Penny shook her hand. "I'm Howard's cousin."

Penny looked stunned as she looked back and forth between Howard and Colette. "Oh, uh... I guess I see the resemblance... Kinda."

"We're related by marriage," Colette clarified.

"Oh! Then, luckily for you, I see no resemblance," Penny remedied, smiling sheepishly.

"Ouch," Howard said halfheartedly, already absorbed in the next round of Halo.

"Well, I was just stopping by because I heard some weird noises coming from here," Penny stated. "I was actually about to head to the mall. Colette, would you like to come with me?" She smiled hopefully at the girl.

"Me?" Colette asked in surprise, a smile soon creeping up on her face. She had never had a friend to go shopping with; she typically hung out with guys, and no straight guys were interested in shopping. "Sure! I'd love to!" She turned to the boys with a giddy smile. "Thank you for letting me play with you guys. I'll see you later." With that, the two girls left the room.

"Your cousin is so adorable," Raj said with a dreamy smile as the door shut, his eyes fixated on the door as his character was blown to bits by a grenade.

"Stop obsessing over my cousin and start paying attention to the game!" Howard scolded, bringing Raj back to their virtual reality.

* * *

"So," Penny started as she drove toward the mall. "Where are you from, Colette?"

"Well, I just finished college in Tucson, Arizona, but I was born in Texas."

"That's cool. What kind of job do you have?"

"Game designing," Colette replied without a speck of hesitation. "Or, at least, that's what I'm hoping to get into. I haven't actually found a job yet." She bit her lip and brushed some hair behind her ear.

"Nice. You like those video game things, like Leonard and the rest of them, huh? I'm sure you'll fit right in."

"'Leonard and the rest of them'?" Colette smirked a bit. She may not have had many girl friends throughout her life, but even she could pick up on singling a guy out in a group for infatuation reasons. "So, what's the story there?"

"What?" Penny replied, her voice an octave too high. "I don't know what you're talking about!"

"Come on, you can tell me," Colette persisted. "I'm not a gossip, don't worry."

"Well.. Me and Leonard kinda used to go out," Penny said quickly.

"And?" Colette pushed.

"And," Penny rolled her eyes a bit. "And I guess I kind of still have feelings for him..." She shrugged lightly. "What about you and Raj?" she asked, quick to change the subject.

Colette blushed brightly. "Wh-what? Me and Raj? There's nothing between us.." She looked out the window, suddenly embarrassed, and completely oblivious as to why. She was used to hanging out with guys, but she had never developed any feelings for any of them. Sure, she has had a crush or two in her life, but she did not typically develop feelings for people she considered friends.

"Come on, you looked really comfortable cuddling up on him like you were when I walked in. You can't say there's _nothing_ there," Penny insisted, a smirk on her face.

"W-well, he is kinda cute, in his own goofy way, and he's got this mysterious allure going on, and the sexiest accent I've ever heard..." Her voice drifted off in a dreamy fashion.

Penny laughed. "You totally like him!"

"What? No I don't!" Colette denied, her face turning bright red. "I'm just trying to help him with his social anxiety disorder..!"

"You said he had, and I quote, 'the sexiest accent I've ever heard'. And, if he's talked to you, you know that he has to like you."

Colette frowned. "He hasn't actually talked to me," she admitted. "I overheard him whispering something to Howard, that's all.."

"Oh.." Penny glanced over at the girl, seeing her disheartened expression. "Well, that doesn't mean he doesn't like you. The fact that he's _not_ talking to you means he thinks you're pretty!"

Colette covered her reddened face with both hands. "Y-you think so..?"

"Definitely," Penny stated. "And, if he thinks you're pretty, then he no doubt likes you." She pulled up in the parking lot and took off her seat belt, giving Colette a mischievous smile. "But, just in case, how about we pick out an outfit for you that even he can't resist?"

Colette giggled lightly and followed Penny into the mall to get her shop on.

* * *

**Alright, mostly just some girl time between Penny and Colette in this one, with a bit o' confessions. Sorry it's so short! :I **

**I promise that the next one will be longer and have more Raj involvement in it. Till then. Have a nice day :3  
**


	3. Chapter 3

**Lookie here~ An early chapter, thanks to my first reviewer! (Thank you, icecoatedsha for your review x3) Anywho, ya'll should like this chapter well enough. Warning and spoiler alert: I'm pretty against alcohol, and much of my writing is based on how I would react to certain situations (because I don't know for sure how anyone else would act, and I happen to think my morals are perfectly fine and dandy for a story character to follow :I)**** With that said, onward to the story!  
**

**I own nothing from BBT**

* * *

"Are you sure this outfit looks good?" Colette asked uncertainly as she changed in Penny's bathroom. The boys were all still in Sheldon and Leonard's apartment playing Halo, but Penny knew they would be ending their game before too long. Unless they ended up tied and decide to have a sudden death round. Those were always _the most fun_ to listen to well into the night.

"Of course I'm sure," Penny stated exasperatedly for what seemed like the hundredth time. There was a sigh from in the bathroom before Colette opened the door, reveling her in a cute, white sundress with spaghetti straps, a large sunflower at the bottom left of the dress, which ended right above the knees.

"It feels so unnatural to show this much skin," Colette said embarrassedly, pulling down at the bottom of the dress, then up at the chest that showed off more cleavage than she was used to.

"But you look _gorgeous_ in that," Penny gushed, eying the girl's flawless legs as she let out a whistle.

"Don't _whistle_ at me," Colette giggled, flitting the bottom of her dress playfully.

"Let me do your hair and makeup now," Penny demanded.

"What? You don't have to, Penny, you've done enough already!"

"Oh, hush! I love giving friends makeovers," Penny stated, ushering a grinning Colette back into the bathroom.

* * *

"I now present to you, the new and improved Colette~!" Penny gushed as she entered the 4A apartment occupied by the boys. "That's your cue, Colette," She whispered loudly toward the door when Colette did not enter the room. All the boys' eyes were fixated on the door in wonder, aside from Sheldon who looked mildly annoyed.

With a sigh of resignation, Colette entered the room, her lipstick covered lips in a tight line and her eyes, the green enhanced by the makeup, were fixated on the kitchen wall in the background.

"Wow," Leonard said in amazement.

"_Day'um,_" Howard voiced his appreciation, making Colette blush lightly and laugh uncontrollably. It also gave her the courage to look toward Raj with a smile.

"What about you, what do you think, Raj?" she asked, hopeful for a response.

Raj stared up at the woman like a deer caught in a headlight, his jaw slack and his eyes wide. He opened his mouth, but quickly closed it afterward.

"Oh, please," Sheldon scoffed, turning his head away. "Just because you put some whale fat on your face and show some skin doesn't make you pretty."

"Sheldon!" Leonard scolded his roommate.

Colette pursed her lips and took a step back, readying herself to make a hasty retreat. Penny saw that she was about to slip away and quickly thought of something to change the mood.

"In celebration of mine and Colette's new outfits, how about we all go out for drinks?" Penny called out enthusiastically, getting approval from Raj, Howard, and Leonard.

"But it's Halo night!" Sheldon exclaimed, looking around at his friends in disbelief.

"Halo night is almost over," Leonard argued.

Raj whispered something in Howard's ear, which earned him a glare from the Jewish man.

"You've been winning since Colette left anyway," Howard stated. "It's getting boring for Raj and I." Raj nodded in agreement as he stood up.

"You guys are terrible sports," Sheldon scolded.

"Says the man who solely blames his team mate for losing against a girl," Colette giggled with a roll of her eyes. "Come on, Sheldon, it'll be fun if you let it!"

"Well, I will not allow my idea of _fun_ to be consuming alcohol and making an idiot of myself, thank you very much," Sheldon stated as he turned off his game and stood up. "Now, if you will all excuse me, World of Warcraft is calling my name; something _much_ more fun than getting drunk." With that, Sheldon grabbed his laptop and left to his room.

"Well, now that the party-pooper's out of the picture," Leonard started happily as he stood up, "we can go have fun. Right, Penny?" He laughed awkwardly as he smiled at the blond, who just smiled back and nodded. Colette laughed lightly and bumped her hip against Penny's, giving her a suggesting look.

"Shall we head out then?" Colette asked the blond with a smile. "I'm sure you know some place fun around here."

"Of course I do," Penny stated with a smile as she led the way out of the apartment.

* * *

The bass beat loudly in the background of the club as the group entered.

"This place is great!" Penny yelled over the music.

"What?" Leonard yelled back, unable to hear.

"I said this place is great!" Penny yelled louder, getting a halfhearted nod from the man, who still could not hear over the music.

The group made their way to a booth, Penny making sure that Colette sat next to Raj.

"Leonard and I will get some drinks," Penny stated, grabbing Leonard by the sleeve of his shirt and dragging him to the bar.

Colette sat awkwardly next to Raj, her eyes wondering around the room. The dance floor was packed with people swaying to the music, most dancing intimately close to their dance partner. Colette blushed as she watched, wishing she actually knew how to dance like those people. Maybe she could ask Raj to dance regardless, and hope to not make a fool of herself.

Penny and Leonard came back to the table and passed out drinks, each one different for each person. Raj practically attacked his grasshopper, drinking half the glass before setting it down with a sigh.

"Thirsty?" Colette asked in amusement as she stared up at the man.

"Parched," Raj stated in a smooth, sexy, thickly accented voice. He leaned down, bringing his face closer to the shocked face of Colette. "Would you like to help me quench my thirst, Colette?"

Colette stared at the man, completely speechless. He had talked. To her. The first thought that came to her mind was: _Damn, his voice is sexy._ Her eyes traveled down to the alcohol in front of him, half empty, and she felt a slight hollowness inside her.

"Does that... Help you talk to women?" Colette asked as she eyed the drink.

"This!" Raj exclaimed as he lifted the glass, a smile on his face. "This is my best friend." He took another sip of the drink and set it back down. "Aside from Howard."

"Yeah, I think he's less of an ass when he communicates through Howard," Penny stated with a laugh.

Colette sighed in defeat. It didn't feel like an accomplishment this way. She knew, better than most, that you were not really yourself when you drank. It didn't feel right. Still, when she looked up into his dark eyes, she could not quell the fluttering sensation in her stomach.

"Would you like to dance with me, Colette?" he whispered softly in her ear, and she shivered slightly, only managing a nod. The two slid out of the booth and headed to the dance floor, leaving Howard and Leonard looking shocked, and Penny smiling in triumph.

"So..." Colette started, her voice barely audible past the music on the dance floor. "I'm not really good at dancing."

Raj laughed as they reached the dance floor and started dancing like the crazy, nerdy Indian boy he was, yelling: "Me neither!"

Colette laughed in response and started dancing with the goofy man. Before long, the song had changed to a slower song. The couple shared a blush, but before either could flee, Colette wrapped her arms around Raj's neck, swaying in rhythm with the more upbeat slow song. Raj smiled, his hands resting on Colette's waist as he danced. His hands slid slowly as the song carried on, soon resting on her bottom. Colette blushed brightly, but otherwise did not react - until Raj squeezed tightly. She let out a squeak of surprise, her hands moving to Raj's to remove them before she backed away quickly and rushed back to the table, her heart racing.

"Hey, Colette!" Penny greeted cheerfully, a knowing smile on her face.

Colette looked around the near empty table, only Penny and Leonard occupying it now, Howard having gone off to hit on some poor, random woman.

"H-Hey," she returned embarrassedly. "Um, I'm not sure I like Raj so much when he's under the influence.."

"Come on, just give him a chance," Penny persisted with a pout. "He just gets a little over-confident when he drinks. But he's talking to you, that's a good thing, right?"

Colette smiled a bit, caving in. "Yeah, alright, I guess." She scooted into the booth next to Leonard and whispered in his ear, "Ask her to dance, dummy!"

Leonard looked at her indigenously, and she just nodded to Penny with a smile.

"Uh, Penny, would you like to dance?" Leonard asked nervously as he turned to the said woman.

"Yeah, sure!" she replied, grabbing Leonard's hand and rushing off to the dance floor. Penny turned back to Colette as they rushed off, smiling excitedly, and Colette returned the expression until she was ignored as the two started dancing.

Colette sipped lightly at her drink as she sat by herself for the next few seconds. She was not big on drinking, but she thought it was acceptable in social situations. Her only rules on the subject were: 1.) Never get so drunk that you do not remember what you did the next morning, and 2.) never get involved emotionally with an alcoholic.

Raj slid beside her in the booth, and she looked up at him, her face reddening. "What happened back there?" he asked worriedly.

"Oh, uh..." She looked away embarrassedly. "I just got embarrassed is all..."

"Oh, come on," Raj started amusedly. "You can't tell me you've never been felt up by a guy before."

Colette blushed as she stared down at her fidgeting fingers.

"Really?" Raj asked in surprise. "None? But, you're so pretty."

Colette laughed lightly, smiling up at Raj. "Thank you..." She leaned her body against his and sighed in contentment. "You have an amazingly sexy voice, by the way. You really shouldn't be self-conscious about talking in front of girls..."

"Oh, th-thank you," Raj stuttered, Colette smiling at the bashful side of Raj that she had gotten used to. "So, you wanna get out of here?"

She bit her lip, wondering if he meant what she thought he meant. "Do you mean, like...?"

"Yeah, we can go back to my place and get jiggy with it," Raj said, his voice slurring a bit as he does a strange little dance in his seat.

Colette laughed quietly and sat up, turning to the drunk man. "I'm flattered, but..."

Raj sighed depressingly. "But you don't wanna do it with me, I get it."

Colette shook her head embarrassedly, "No, that's not what I meant! I just..." She moved closer and said softly in his ear, "I don't want my first time with you to be while you're drunk..."

"But I'll never have the courage to ask you when I'm sober!" Raj whined, his body sinking down into his seat.

Colette giggled and patted him lightly on the cheek. "Don't worry, we'll work on it. This was fun, but I need to go. I've got a long day of apartment-hunting ahead of me tomorrow." She leaned in, planting a kiss on Raj's cheek. "Night, Raj." She quickly downed the rest of her drink, not wanting to waste it, and left the club, leaving Raj smiling like an idiot as he touched his cheek.

* * *

**Alright, now we're makin' some progress! But, like any good love story, there are some rough patches waiting ahead on the road to happiness for this pair. We've already seen some conflicts of interest, but perhaps they can pull through unscathed.. **

**On another note, I've found that it is much simpler to write a love story involving a foreign mute than an OCD, border-lining autistic scientist. I don't have to try to come up with reasons for him to do something completely out of character, like go clubbing (Not baby seal clubbing, like dance clubbing. I don't think it'd really take much to convince Sheldon to club baby seals. Just give him a club and trap him in a room with some, and when push comes to shove, I think he'd be much more worried about his own survival than some baby seals' survival. What? Don't give me that look, I'm just sayin'... :I)**

**Anyway, laterz! I hope all of you readers have a wonderful day :3**


	4. Chapter 4

**I do not own the Big Bang Theory. I only aspire to learn the names of all the different Robins in the Batman universe...**

* * *

"Tell her yourself, I'm not your owl!" Howard yelled at Raj after the man whispered something in his ear, for the umpteenth time since he arrived at Wolowitz's house. Colette, who was sitting beside her cousin, jumped a bit at the outburst. She watched her cousin silently as he stormed out of the room in annoyance and, as soon as he was out of the room, she grinned at Raj and giggled.

"I can't believe he referenced _Harry Potter_," Colette said, taking a moment to contemplate her words as she chewed on the back of her pencil. "Actually, scratch that, yes I can. It was still funny, though." She smiled and set her pencil and newspaper down on the coffee table, which she had been using to look through apartment ads. She turned so she was facing Raj and tucked her legs under her body, the commercial on the television filling the rare silence in the background. "So, what did you want to tell me?"

Raj blushed and pressed his lips together in response.

"Come on, Raj..!" she whined, stretching her body across the couch and half laying on the man's lap. "Why can you still not talk to me..?" Colette stared up at Raj as she lazed there. Raj stared down at her like he was staring at a ghost - he looked oddly horrified. Colette realized why when she felt something poke at her back. She sat up quicker than she thought she was capable of, her face on fire, barely registering the squeak that came from Raj. "Th-that's the weirdest and most embarrassing reassurement I've ever experienced."

Raj turned away from her and covered his face with both hands, curling into a ball on the opposite end of the couch. Colette took pity on him - god only knows the sort of embarrassments she would have faced if she couldn't hide her arousal.

"Don't be embarrassed, Raj" she cooed, scooting closer to him despite her own embarrassment. "I take it as a compliment." Raj peeked at her through his fingers and she offered a smile. "Here, I wanna try something!" She grabbed Raj's hand and pulled him off the couch, heading to the hallway. She stopped just before she reached the corner, pressing her hand into Raj's chest to get him to stop. "You stay right here." She let go of his hand and rounded the corner, making sure she was out of his line of sight. "Now say something."

Silence insued for several seconds. Colette sighed quietly, trying not to lose her patience.

"Just pretend I'm not here, Raj. Out of sight, out of mind."

More silence. Colette frowned deeply, upset that her idea was not working. _It was a dumb idea anyway._

"I get sad when I pretend you're not here," Raj said, suddenly, his voice so quite that Colette almost didn't hear it. She smiled giddily and edged a bit closer to the corner, staying close to the wall.

"Why does that make you sad?" she asked, her voice almost as quiet as Raj's. She could hear him shuffle closer to the edge.

"Because, you're nice, and funny, and completely adorable..."

Colette's heart fluttered at the complement, her smile growing. "Aw, that's so sweet, Raj..."

"Will you do it with me now?" Well, so much for the sweet moment.

Colette rolled her eyes and turned the corner, standing uncomfortably close the the Indian man. She leaned her body against the wall, jutting her hip out a little more than really necessary, and looked up at Raj. "What was that?" she asked, running a hand from his elbow down to his wrist. "I couldn't quite hear you around the corner..."

Raj made a strangled noise. He opened his mouth, then quickly closed it before repeating the process. No coherent thoughts made it past his lips, though, despite his efforts. With a look of combined frustration and defeat, Raj turned around and slowly walked away, leaving the house without another peep.

Colette watched as the strange man left, crossing her arms and leaning her back against the wall. "Maybe that was too much..." With a sigh of defeat, she pushed herself off the wall and walked back to the couch to resume her previous task.

"Did I hear the door open!?" screamed Howard's mother from another room. "Who's here!?"

"Raj was just leaving!" Colette yelled back.

"What!? Why did he leave!? Was Howard being a bad host!? Howard, stop being a bad host to your friends!"

"I wasn't being a bad host, mom!" Howard yelled in his defense from his room.

"Don't get fresh with me, young man! I know a bad host when I see one!"

Colette laughed slightly and set the newspaper back down, knowing she would not make much progress with the argument going on in the background. Why was it so difficult to find a decent apartment in this big city?

* * *

**I know it's going really slow, but... Raj's awkwardness is so cute.. I can't help that it causes for chapters to cut off abruptly... :"I**

**And just a quick announcement: I've found another Raj story~! It's Raj and Lola by LunaNomea, go check it out! I haven't finished reading it yet, but I think she's done a good job so far plot-wise, and she's a great writer :3**

**Till next time, have a nice week! :3**


	5. Chapter 5

**My sincerest apologies for missing last week's update! I went on an unscheduled trip at the last minute to visit my brother, and ended up staying longer than I had anticipated. But, I'm back, and, unless unforeseen future events occur that hinder the progress of this fanfiction, there will be no more missed updates! Now, I've made you wait long enough, so read on~!**

* * *

Colette walked down the street of Pasadena, the soles of her converse tapping lightly on the ground as her eyes drifted around at the many signs and advertisements. She stopped short when she saw a sign that read: **The Comic Center of Pasadena.**

"Well, I do like comic books," she muttered to herself as she walked into the building. She looked around with a small smile at the large arrangement of comics. Not noticing the strange looks she got from the other patrons, she strode leisurely to one of the set ups, sifting through the comics.

"Can I help you?" asked a nervous, awkward male voice, causing Colette to look up. The man had short, curly, brown hair with matching eyes, and was adorned in very casual attire.

"Oh, I'm just browsing..." She smiled at the man. "Actually, it's more like window shopping, I don't really have the money to spend on such luxuries at the moment," she admitted bashfully, painfully aware of her lack of a regular financial income.

"Oh, I see," the man said, a tinge of depression in his tone. "Well, I'm Stuart, I own this store. You'll have to excuse the rest of the guys here, they're not used to seeing a woman."

Colette finally looked around, taking notice of the strange looks of awe and fear from every other guy in the room. "Oh. I'm Colette, and... My apologies.."

"No, no, you're more than welcome here," Stuart stated quickly. "I'm sure every other guy in here would agree." A few of the guys nodded and murmured their agreement, while others returned to their browsing with a little more precision in their actions, as though trying to look more impressive.

"That's nice to know." Colette almost could not contain the giggle that wanted to escape her. Nerds could be so cute sometimes.

"Well, take your time. Let me know if you need anything. I'll be the one behind that desk over there." He laughed oddly as he pointed to the checkout desk, then gave a slight wave before heading back.

Colette pursed her lips together in thought, then decided to follow the man. "Actually, I do have a question." Stuart stopped quickly and turned back to her.

"You do?" He sounded a little too eager, but Colette just smiled.

"Are you hiring?"

There was a slight pause.

"Well, you could probably help bring in more customers... Alright, you're hired."

* * *

Colette hummed a happy tune as she walked up to the Wolowitz house. She stopped as she stepped into a large, shallow puddle of water on the porch, following the flow of it coming from under the door. With a slight panic constricting her chest, she quickly opened the door.

"Howard?" she called, her panic growing as she saw the soaked state of the living room carpet. "Mrs. Wolowitz?"

"Colette, is that you!?" came the screech of the woman coming from the second floor. "Get Howard! I broke the toilet! There's water everywhere!"

"Alright, Mrs. Wolowitz!" Colette yelled back, quickly pulling out her cell phone and calling her cousin.

* * *

Colette had already helped her aunt out of the bathroom and out of the house by the time Howard had arrived. A towel was draped over the woman's shoulders, and her hair a wild mess of damp tangles.

"What happened?" he asked as he opened the door, looking horrified at the state of the house.

"Sorry, Howie, I broke the toilet," his mother answered him.

"I already called the water company, they turned off the water," Colette stated. "We'll need to have the toilet in the upstairs bathroom fixed, and just about the entire house was soaked by the time I got here. I'm sure there's a lot of water damage that'll need to be fixed."

"Alright," Howard replied as he ran a hand through his hair, letting out an uneven sigh. "No one's hurt?"

"Your mom's a little bruised, but nothing major. We can take her to the hospital, though, if you're worried."

Howard walked over to his mom, stroking her hair comfortingly. "You alright mom?" he asked worriedly.

"I'm fine, Howie, my tush just hurts a little."

Colette sighed and walked off the porch, finally noticing that the guys were there as well. She offered a small smile to them. "Hey," she greeted shortly.

"Is everything okay?" Leonard asked a bit awkwardly, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

"Yeah, yeah... We'll just probably have to stay somewhere else for a while, while the house is being fixed..." She looked back at the building and bit her lip, knowing she could not afford to stay at a hotel for an indefinite amount of time. She may have just gotten a job, but minimum wage was not going to be enough to cover the costs of a hotel. And she definitely was not going to let Howard pay for her, he was going to be owing enough money for all the repairs.

"Well, if you guys need a place to stay," Leonard began slowly.

"No," Sheldon intervened quickly, knowing where his roommate was going with this. "They are not welcome to live in our apartment indefinitely, Leonard."

"Sheldon, come on!" Leonard argued. "It's an emergency, and it'll only be for a couple of days, I'm sure."

"Absolutely not." Sheldon was persistent in his stance. "Why can't she stay with Raj? She seems to spend more time with him than us, anyhow."

Colette blushed a bit, despite the fact that she knew Sheldon was not insinuating anything; at least, not to her knowledge. Raj whispered something into Leonard's ear before he could protest further.

"Alright then, I guess it's settled," Leonard said with a tinge of defeat. "Raj said you can stay with him if you need to."

Colette blinked a few times at the foreign man. "Thank you, Raj," she said softly, offering another small smile.

* * *

**So... Progress! Just for the record, I've never seen a house flooded from a toilet breaking, so I honestly have no idea what the protocol for that would be... But I assume one would have to have carpets taken out, and make sure the foundation didn't corrode from prolonged exposure to water... So, that's what we're going with here! **

**Sorry this chapter was so short... Be watching out for another chapter soon! :)**


	6. Chapter 6

**You know, I don't fancy myself very talented at writing... So, you can imagine how blissful all those nice reviews make me feel :"D I give a big _Thank You~!_ to everyone who's reviewed thus far, it makes it _so_ much easier for me to put my work out there when I know others are actually enjoying it.**** And, my apologies for this one being so short~! I tried to make it longer, but alas, my mad-lib skills can only take me so far... But, it's sweet to make up for it, so I hope you'll all forgive me.. :3  
**

**Anywayzzz... Enjoy!**

* * *

Colette looked around the little apartment. She was officially moved in with the one and only Rajesh Koothrappali, and she was still a little dazed at the fact.

Howard's mother had insisted that they stay in a hotel, and Raj had seemed more than a little relieved at that. In truth, Colette was as well. She needed time away from the screeching of the Wolowitz family, and what better place to get that than in the home of a selective mute?

She turned to Raj, who stood uncomfortably at the door, and offered him a smile.

"Thanks again for letting me stay here, Raj," she said, wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him into a hug. She ignored the fact that he pointed his pelvis away from her as he wrapped his arms around her shoulders. Pulling away, Colette offered him another small smile. "Do you think you'll ever get over the whole 'not being able to talk to me while you see me' thing?" Raj just looked away and shrugged in response, earning him a hair tousling from the girl. "Well, if we're going to be living together, we need some form of communication that isn't just me blabbing away all the time." She walked over to her bag and pulled out a notebook and a pen before handing both items to Raj. "If you have something you want to say to me, just write it down. That'll have to do for now." She went and sat on the couch, tucking her legs under her body and sighing quietly in the silence as she stared at nothing.

The day had taken its toll on Colette. The joy of finding a job had been cut short upon finding her cousin's home flooded, and she was lucky enough to have been able to salvage most of her things from the building before anything was seriously damaged. She really didn't feel like doing anything else for the rest of the day. She just wanted to sit, and maybe ignore reality with some mind-numbing television.

Raj started writing something from where he stood, causing Colette's gaze to land on him. She watched him write for a few seconds, then her eyes followed him as he approached her and flipped the notebook so she could read: '_What would you like for dinner?'_

She smiled at him. "Whatever you want, sweetie," she answered softly.

He turned the notebook back around and scribbled something else. _'What is your favorite food?'_

Colette laughed lightly. "Food is food, I like it all," she stated vaguely. Raj lifted an eyebrow at her, as if to say _You can't not have a favorite food._ "But," Colette continued slowly upon the prying look. "If I had to choose a favorite, I'd say... spaghetti." She nodded in confirmation. "Yep, I'm a pasta-lover, no doubt. And Italian food is amazing. We could also do pizza, it's probably a lot easier."

Raj flipped the notebook over again and scribbled something before turning it back to Colette. _'Spaghetti it is.'_ He smiled a small smile before heading into the kitchen and getting out all the necessary materials and ingredients to make the meal. Colette followed behind him with a bright smile of her own.

"I'll help then," she stated. "Just instruct me on what you want me to do, boss man." She gave a mock solute to Raj, grinning up at him. A man who could cook; it doesn't get better than that. He wrote something on the notepad and handed it to her.

_'I'll cook, you relax.'_

She was wrong, it did get better: a man who could cook _and_ who was willing to do so while she relaxed. That was something she could happily become accustomed to. The fact that the man himself was gorgeous beyond belief didn't hurt, either.

Unable to help herself, she wrapped her arms around his midsection from the side. "You know, I find a man who can cook irresistibly sexy," she purred into his ear before pressing her lips to his cheek. "Thank you, Raj." With a bright smile flashed at the now flustered man, Colette practically skipped into the living room, stretching out on the couch and turning on the television. It probably would not do either of them any good if she were to breath down the man's neck while he cooked, anyway. But she figured a few compliments here and there would help boost his confidence. She just hoped it didn't inflate his ego too much.

* * *

**_And, another one bites the dust~_**

**Another chapter, I mean. And by _bites the dust_, I mean, _has been posted._ Yeah, I went there. :B**

**Well, now that I've caught up with my chapter schedule, keep an eye out for chapter 7 next week!**


	7. Chapter 7

It was another average Monday morning in Pasadena, California. The nerds went about their usual scientific business, the aspiring waitresses of Pasadena worked their part-time jobs in the Cheesecake Factory, and all was right with the world. It also happened to be Colette's first day of work at the comic book store.

She woke early that morning, bright eyed and bushy-tailed. As much so as one can be early in the morning after having developed horrible sleeping habits for the past month. Colette slammed her hand on the off button of her alarm clock, glaring at the device that beamed 6:00 AM in her face. With a resigned sigh, she got up and headed to the kitchen, her excessively big t-shirt nearly covering her sleeping shorts, stopping about mid-thigh.

"Today is a pancake day," she muttered to herself as she combed her fingers through her hair, then prepared the said meal.

Raj awoke to the delightful smell not even an hour later, wondering into the kitchen, his eyes barely open in his half-conscious state. "Smell's good," he drawled out from the other side of the room, making Colette jump slightly at the unexpected noise. She recovered quickly, turning to Raj with a smile.

"Blueberry pancakes," she stated happily. "Would you like some?"

Raj's eyes opened comically wide, as though the situation had just dawned on him. He eyed Colette, starting from her bare feet and slowly working his way up to her mid-thigh, taking in all the skin that was showing. It wasn't much, but still, it was a girl in her girly pajamas in his home at six in the morning. The red was visible on his face as he quickly pulled his eyes away from Colette's legs and up to her face. She just looked amused.

"How many do you want?" she asked, still waiting for a response to her fist question. Raj quickly held up three fingers before rushing out of the kitchen. The shower could be heard moments later.

Colette stifled a giggle and turned to pour more batter onto the skillet.

The rest of the morning had been relatively quiet. Colette wasn't a morning person, and Raj was, well, Raj. They ate their breakfast in silence before parting ways for work.


	8. Chapter 8

**Two in one day, to make up for the previous chapter being so short (and me actually being too lazy to complete it... Oh well, the rest was just gunna be filler stuff... :T )**

**Enjoy**

* * *

Colette sat curled up on the couch, an enticing book in her hands and her reading glasses perched upon the bridge of her nose - it was a very rare occurrence when she wore her reading glasses. She figured she was welcome to stay at Raj's place for as long as she needed, and she planned to stay at least until she could help him with his social anxiety. On that note, the said astrophysicist walked in the door. Colette did not respond at first, having gotten absorbed in the story she was reading. She turned her head slightly when she heard the door shut, her eyes barely leaving the page until her mind registered that someone had come in.

"Raj!" she called cheerfully, sticking her make-shift bookmark into the book and setting it down, along with her glasses, before springing to her feet. "You have some really interesting books. I hope you don't mind that I started reading one."

Raj smiled and shook his head, shrugging off his jacket and hanging it by the door.

"Good." She smiled and bound closer to the man. "So, how was your day?" she asked as she followed him toward his bedroom, hoping for a verbal answer. He just turned to her with a smile, giving her a thumbs-up. Colette's frown went unseen as Raj turned away and walked into his room. She sighed silently and sat back on the couch. Raj was back out after a few seconds, his notebook in one hand, and his pencil in the other. He sat next to Colette with a smile and started jotting something down on the paper.

"How about..." Colette started, reaching out to take Raj's hands in her own, effectively stopping his writing, "we try talking to each other now?" She offered a warm smile at Raj's startled expression. "Please? I really wanna hear your voice..." She jutted her bottom lip out ever so slightly, enticing a reply from the man.

Raj opened his mouth, offering a breathy squeak, then quickly closing his mouth in embarrassment. Colette set aside the notebook before scooting closer to Raj, taking his hands properly in her own. He stared down at their joined hands, looking flustered.

"Just relax," Colette said softly, rubbing circles on Raj's knuckles with her thumb. "Close your eyes, take a deep breath. I'm not going to judge you... You have no reason to feel insecure around me..."

Raj did as she instructed, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. His face scrunched up after a second, and he looked uncomfortable. He opened his eyes, staring desperately into Colette's for a moment before averting his eyes. Colette wasn't sure whether the look he sported was embarrassment or shame this time. Her chest tightened at the sight, and she instinctively reached her hand out, guiding his face back to look at her. She study his face for a few seconds. He looked almost scared from the physical contact, and he kept avoiding her eyes, only looking into them for a couple of seconds with several in between.

"You're really such a handsome man," Colette said softly, a small smile pulling at her lips as she rubbed his face ever so gently. Raj reddened at the complement, his eyes darting to Colette's eyes, then down to her lips for a lingering second before he closed his eyes altogether. Their faces were so close, Raj could feel Colette's warm breath on his cheek, his other cheek and hand set aflame from her touch. Was she going to kiss him? Raj puckered his lips slightly, unsure as to whether or not he should have. Oh well, it's done now, too late to go back. It enticed a giggle from the brunette. Then, there was warmth.

Colette pressed her lips lightly to Raj's awaiting ones. The kiss was simple and lingered for only a second before Colette pulled away, her cheeks red and her smile somewhere between love-struck giddy and school-girl shy. Raj opened his eyes, a dreamy smile pulling at his own lips. He could not recall a girl having ever looked at him like that, and seeing Colette sitting in front of him with a look akin to admiration stirred up butterflies in the man's stomach.

"So," she said softly, averting her eyes bashfully. "You wanna tell me how your day was?"

Raj's smile vanished. Why couldn't they just keep kissing? Why did she have to insist on him talking? Then a thought came to mind; he still had some rum cake in his fridge! He could eat some of that without her knowing it had alcohol in it, then he would be able to talk to her, and then they could make out and eventually do it! Wait, would it be bad to sneak behind her back like that? There was snogging on the line, so it had to be worth it, right?

Raj pursed his lips and held up his finger, quickly standing up and heading to the kitchen, aware of Colette's eyes on him the entire way. He got a glass of water and drank some of it, slowly, as if trying to throw her off his trail. Colette's eyes drifted appreciatively over Raj's neck as his adam's apple bobbed up and down. Raj then went to the fridge, pulling off a decent enough amount of the rum cake and stuffing it in his mouth. He swallowed and wiped the crumbs from his hand onto the side of his pants, quickly destroying the evidence.

"It wasn't very productive," Raj said from behind the fridge. "How was your day?" He shut the fridge door and walked back over to the couch with an easy smile. His smile faltered lightly when Colette's bright eyes shone on him.

"It was pretty good," she replied through her grin. "Stuart showed me how to use the cash register and how he organizes the comics."

"Stuart?" Raj asked in surprise.

"Yeah, that's my boss."

"Wait, you work at the comic book store? With Stuart?" Raj was perplexed. When had this development occurred? And why did the fact both turn him on incredibly and make him see green with jealousy at the same time?

"Yeah... You know Stuart?" She narrowed her eyes at him. Something seemed off. He was talking way too smoothly; no stuttering or pauses, no signs of any struggles he tends to face while talking to her.

"Yeah, me and the guys go to the comic book store all the time!" Raj blushed lightly at that. "Well, you know, not _all_ the time, 'cause that would be lame. I mean, we go occasionally. I kind of know Stuart."

"Oh, yeah?" Colette examined his face closely. There was a crumb on the side of his mouth, and she reached her hand out, wiping the offending item off his face. She then promptly stuck her finger in her mouth, tasting the content.

Raj stared at her with wide eyes, his face going red. "That was kinda hot. You wanna move this to the bedroom?"

"Rum cake?" was Colette's response as she narrowed her eyes at the man. Raj's face quickly drained of color. _Damn_ she was good.

"Oh, um, that," Raj stuttered out, averting his eyes as he wiped his mouth of any more evidence that may have lingered.

"Really, Raj?" Colette looked up at him in disappointment when he didn't even try to defend himself.

"What's so wrong with me using alcohol to talk?" Raj defended, sending a frown at the girl.

"Because!" Colette suddenly burst out, her disappointed gaze turning into an all-out glare. "I don't want to be involved with another alcoholic! It's caused too much crap to go wrong, and I'm tired of dealing assholes constantly ruining my life!" Colette stood abruptly and rushed to the door, going to slip her shoes on.

"Wait, where are you going?" Raj asked, a tinge of fear in his voice. He stood, but dared not approach her.

"Out." With that, Colette left the room, Raj flinching as she slammed the door shut with enough force to rattle the pictures on the walls.


	9. Chapter 9

Colette knocked at the door labeled 4B. Her face was red from both anger and physical exertion from climbing the four flights of stairs. She was infuriated, as her time on the bus had only helped to further fuel her anger - who wouldn't become angrier after riding on the disgusting city bus?

Penny opened the door after a moment, wearing a exposing pink dress, no shoes on her feet, and her makeup half done. Colette felt a pang of guilt. She sometimes forgot that her friends had a life that didn't always involve her. She had gotten angry and stormed over without any regard to Penny's plans, or without even calling ahead first.

"What's up, Cole?" Penny asked, and Colette had to give a smile at the nickname. Then she frowned, feeling almost obligated to just leave and let Penny go on with her original plans for the evening.

"It's..." She hesitated for a bit. If she did leave now, she would not be able to get the leach of hatred off her chest, but she really did hate to be a bother. "It's nothing, you're busy, I'll come back another time." She turned to leave, but was stopped abruptly as Penny grabbed her arm.

"What's wrong?" she asked, looking worried.

"How did you..?"

"Girl, no one goes to another person's place and says nothing is up and then tries to leave unless it's bad news," Penny stated, as though it were the most obvious thing in the world. "So, what's wrong? Do we need ice cream and tequila?"

Colette smiled at her friend, glad that she had chosen to go to Penny rather than Howard; it actually would have been a very awkward conversation to have with Howard, anyhow.

"Ice cream, maybe," Colette replied. "I think we can save the tequila for future emergencies."

"Damn, I really wanted tequila," Penny joked, giving a lopsided smile before letting Colette into her apartment, her expression turning serious. "So, seriously, what's up? Did you and Raj have a falling out?"

"Can you even call it a 'falling out' if we're not together in the first place?" Colette whined as she curled up on the couch, watching as her friend went to the kitchen, bringing back a large tub of ice cream and two spoons. Colette laughed lightly as Penny handed her a spoon. "I wasn't serious about the ice cream, but thanks." She took a bite and smiled at the flavor: chocolate.

"No girl can resist ice cream in a crisis." The two shared a short giggle. "So?"

Colette sighed and stuck her spoon in the ice cream. "Well... I don't like his dependence on alcohol."

"Why not?" Penny asked, earning a look from Colette. "Alright, dumb question. He's kind of an ass when he drinks, isn't he?"

"It's not that - well, that's part of it, but it's not why I'm here."

Penny stared at her, waiting for her to continue. Colette sighed again.

"My dad was an alcoholic," Colette confessed, hugging her legs and staring at the floor. "He was always drunk, and he yelled a lot and said a lot of mean things... But, I know that's not who he really was. On his death bed, the only time I had ever seen him sober, he told me he was sorry for everything..." She closed her eyes, the memory fresh in her mind like salt on an open wound. "So, I don't exactly condone drinking. I want Raj to be able to talk to me without it."

"Oh, honey..." She rubbed Colette's arm lightly, in an attempt to comfort her. "So, give him a chance," Penny suggested. "Try to help him with it. That's what you said you were doing in the first place, right?" She smiled.

"I tried," Colette said quietly. "I tried to get him to talk to me today, when he got home from work."

"What happened?" Penny was on the edge of her seat, sensing this was the reason she had come. Her hypothesis was further proven by the scoff Colette let out.

"He went behind my back and ate rum cake. _Rum cake_! Who does that?" She threw her arms in the air in exasperation. "And... and maybe I did overreact without really giving him a good reason, but I'm still mad, damn it! He _knows_ I want him to be able to talk to me without alcohol, and I have to wonder if he even gives a damn. I hadn't even been trying to get him to talk for a whole five minutes before he gave up!" Colette let out a breath of air, her posture deflating. "Why is it that when I meet a nice, cute guy, he has to end up being just like my asshole of a father..?"

"Aw," Penny cooed sympathetically, pulling the girl into a hug. "There, there... How about we get your mind off of it, huh? Let's go do something fun. Whatever you wanna do, just name it."

"I wanna sing," Colette announced quietly, leaning her head on Penny's shoulder but not returning the hug. "Karaoke."

"Karaoke it is!" Penny cheered. "Let me just finish getting ready, then we'll head out." She stood up and headed back to her bedroom. "And help yourself to the ice cream."

Colette looked at the tub of ice cream in discretion. She grabbed the spoon and shoveled another mouthful of the creamy sweetness into her mouth as she waited on her friend.

"Here, put this on," Penny instructed as she dropped a cute skirt on the couch. "It should go with your shirt. You always have to look cute when you go out for karaoke, it's one of the unwritten laws of being a woman." She grinned at Colette shortly before returning to getting ready.

Colette picked up the skirt, looking over it. It was cute, and looked like it would stop a little above her knees. With an indifferent shrug of her shoulders, she peeled off her pants and pulled the skirt on in their place.

"See if these fit," Penny said as she walked back into the room, her makeup finished. She set a pair of flats in front of Colette before sitting and putting on heels for herself. "I'm not sure what your standing on heels is."

"I despise them with a passion," Colette informed her friend as she slipped on the shoes. "These are perfect, thanks." She offered Penny a grateful smile.

"No problem. Now, let's go." Penny smiled back before standing up, putting the ice cream back in the freezer before leading Colette out of the apartment.


	10. Chapter 10

The two girls walked into a small bar filled with people. There was a small crowd sitting at round tables in front of a stage. Some people were cheering on the man wailing unprofessionally into the microphone, his music filling the bar, while the rest were absorbed in conversing with their companions.

"Come on, let's sign us up for a song," Penny said excitedly as she led the way to the DJ.

"I'm not so sure about this anymore," Colette protested nervously as she glanced around at all the strangers. So. Many. _Strangers._ She may have gotten over her inability to speak to the opposite sex, but she still had some horrible stage fright.

"It's not so scary," Penny encouraged. "I mean, you can't be any worse than that guy." She pointed to the man on the stage, who was practically screaming incoherently at this point, the crowd around him laughing and jeering. Colette giggled a bit at the man.

"Yeah, but still," she protested weakly. "I'm not good in front of crowds..."

"We'll do the first song together," Penny said finally, looking through the song book. "Now, get over here and help me pick out a song."

Colette sighed dramatically, but smiled as she looked over the book with her friend.

"How about this one?" Colette asked excitedly as she pointed at the song.

"Oh, girl, you have great taste in music!" Penny declared with a grin as she wrote their name and song on slip of paper and handed it to the DJ. "You wanna get a drink before we have to go on?" She asked as they headed to the bar. "It'll help with your nerves, I'm sure."

"I suppose it couldn't hurt," Colette agreed with a nod as they sat down and ordered drinks.

"Give it up for Penny and Colette!" the DJ called out. The crowd had subsided a bit, but what was left gave some whoops as the two girls walked onto the stage. Penny ate up the attention, laughing and waving to the crowd. Colette followed behind her more reservedly, laughing quietly at her friend.

The music for _So What_ by Pink started playing as the DJ worked his magic, causing the crowd to cheer louder.

Penny started singing along with the lyrics, though she knew the song by heart. She started dancing to the music as she sang, loud and proud, her off-tune singing over powering Colette's timid singing. She bumped hips with the smaller girl during an instrumental solo.

"Dance with me!" She encouraged Colette, dancing playfully. The crowd loved it.

Colette laughed as she bumped her hip against Penny's in return before dancing, a carefree smile on her face.

As the next section of the song began, she sang and danced with glee.

Roughly half an hour into their karaoke adventures, Penny's phone went off.

_**Help, I pissed Colette off! -Raj.**_

Penny rolled her eyes, rather angry at the man for his stupidity in the first place.

"Who's texting?" Colette asked as she sipped her drink through a tiny straw, pushing the little umbrella away with her pinkie.

"No one important," Penny replied shortly as she sent back a reply.

**Grow a pair and apologize. -Penny**.

"Well, they're calling out my next song," Colette stated when the DJ called out her name, causing a roar of cheers from the crowd that had gathered thanks to the two girls' performances. "I'm off to please my fans." She smiled off her dramatic words as she rushed up to the stage.

Penny smiled after her when her phone went off again.

_**I would but I don't know where she is. Do you know where she is? Please, I really need to tell her I'm sorry -Raj.**_

Penny pursed her lips. She knew Raj well enough, given the fact that they've only spoken a handful of times when he was drinking. He could be kind of an ass when he drank too much, but she knew he wasn't a bad person. She looked up at Colette, watching the girl's shining face as she danced around and sang her heart out. With a quiet sigh, Penny texted the address of the bar to Raj. Giving him a chance to at least apologize couldn't hurt, right?

Raj sat at the bar, staring up silently at Colette as she danced around the stage. She was amazing, and her voice was _beautiful_. It did things to Raj that he could not begin to explain. He had a grasshopper sitting on the bar in front of him, but he hadn't touched it yet. Penny saw him and rushed over.

"So, you're going to apologize?" she asked as she sat next to him.

"I don't know, I'm losing courage fast," Raj replied honestly, only taking her eyes off of Colette for long enough to spare Penny a glance.

"Sing her a song, then," Penny suggested. "Something romantic and heartfelt that'll let her know that you're sorry and don't want her to be mad at you." She swooned a bit at the thought, wishing a guy would serenade her every time he pissed her off. Maybe then she wouldn't break up so much.

"Are you crazy?" Raj asked, looking at Penny like she'd grown a second head. "I can't sing. Not in front of all the pretty girls in the bar... And definitely not in front of Colette..." He sighed and looked longingly at the girl in question.

"Maybe this will help." Penny slid his grasshopper closer to him.

"Isn't this what got me into this mess in the first place?" Raj asked, eying the drink like it might try to bite him. "Maybe I should just cut my losses and admit that I'm either going to end up all alone for the rest of my life or stuck with Howard..." He turned in his seat, crossing his arms over the table and resting his head atop his forearms.

"Well, that's one option," Penny drawled dryly. "You could also grow a pair and go apologize, or you can down some liquid stupidity enhancer, get up on the stage, sing your heart out, and beg her forgiveness once the hangover passes."

Raj sent her a sideways glare.

"What? I'm just saying. You can either give up, or do something about your situation." Penny shrugged off the look she got.

"Fine," Raj said haughtily, grabbing his grasshopper and downing it, making a face as he set it down. "I'm going for the latter, seeing as my other options aren't feasible." He ordered another drink and downed that as well, letting out a little giggle. "Feasible. That's a funny word."

"I think you've had enough," Penny piped in as Raj went to order another.

"You're right," Raj agreed. "I need to go sing her something." He stood confidently, his body swaying ever so slightly as he took a B line for the DJ, avoiding being seen by Colette as she hopped off the stage.

"That was great, you have an amazing voice," a bald, muscular man complimented Colette as he walked up to her.

"Thanks," Colette chirped as she headed to the bar, sitting next to Penny. The man followed her.

"Can I buy you a drink?" He asked. Colette turned to Penny, a look of slight panic on her face.

"Thanks, but... I was planning on leaving." She gave a small smile to the man before turning to Penny. "Ready to go?"

"We can't go yet!" Penny exclaimed, earning a heated glare from the brunette girl. "I mean, how about we do one more song before heading home?"

"But..."

"So, how about that drink?" the man asked with a smirk, leaning against the bar and getting the bartender's attention. "A sex on the beach, for the pretty lady and her friend."

Colette frowned at Penny, who just shrugged nervously and took a sip of the girly drink that was set in front of her.

"Thank you," Colette said politely as she took the drink. "But, for the record, I'm not interested in a hook up. I already have a boyfriend." Her stomach fluttered as Raj's face popped up in her mind. She usually said that she was taken when she's being hit on by someone she's not interested it - it was an easy let down, and she could yell at any jerk who tries to hit on her after she's said it, so it was a good excuse. But she didn't really consider Raj her _boyfriend_ at this point. Sure, they flirted and shared some small touches and kisses, but neither of them had really established a relationship. Still, she couldn't shake the thought of having Raj as a boyfriend, and she felt warm and giddy, despite herself.

"I never said anything about hooking up," the man stated with a smile, holding up his hands in defense. "I just wanted to buy a pretty lady a drink."

"Well, thank you..." Colette said, feeling a slight ping of guilt as she offered the man a sincere smile.

"This is for a special lady out there," came a familiar Indian accent from the stage.

Colette turned her head in surprise, locking eyes with the one and only Rajesh Koothrappalli. He stood on the stage, looking massively nervous as he pulled at his collar to try to loosen the constricting clothing around his neck. The music started up for _Always Be My Baby_ by Mariah Carey, and Raj started singing as the lyrics rolled by on the screen in front of him.

_**"We were as one babe**_

_**For a moment in time**_

_**And it seemed everlasting**_

_**That you would always be mine**_

_**Now you wanna be free**_

_**So I'll let you fly**_

_**'Cause I know in my heart babe**_

_**Our love will never die**_

_**[Chorus:]**_

_**You'll always be a part of me**_

_**I'm part of you indefinitely**_

_**Boy don't you know you can't escape me**_

_**Ooh darling 'cause you'll always be my baby**_

_**And we'll linger on**_

_**Time can't erase a feeling this strong**_

_**No way you're never gonna shake me**_

_**Ooh darling 'cause you'll always be my baby**_

_**I ain't gonna cry no**_

_**And I won't beg you to stay**_

_**If you're determined to leave boy**_

_**I will not stand in your way**_

_**But inevitably**_

_**You'll be back again**_

_**'Cause you know in your heart babe**_

_**Our love will never end**_

_**[Chorus]**_

_**I know that you'll be back boy**_

_**When your days and your nights get a little bit colder**_

_**I know that you'll be right back baby**_

_**Oh baby believe me it's only a matter of time**_

_**[Chorus]"**_

Colette stared at Raj in shock, unable to decide which of the swirling emotions in her head she should feel. She wasn't sure whether she wanted to laugh hysterically, ball her eyes out, or scream and throw things at him. He was obviously drunk, and he wasn't a very good singer, but his voice held sincere emotion and he got so into the song it was almost comical. Had the situation been different, Colette probably would have been laughing and swooning at the situation. But all thoughts of doing either went out the window when Raj tripped and stumbled off the stage.

Colette and Penny rushed over to the fallen, drunken idiot.

"I think I did drink too much," Raj groaned as the girls helped him to his feet.

"Are you alright?" Penny asked, looking as though she was trying not to laugh.

"Peachy," Raj said with a goofy smile.

"Alright, now that that's been established," Colette drawled, still holding Raj's arm to keep him steady.

"Oh, Colette!" Raj exclaimed suddenly turning to the woman with a look of desperation. Colette's heart skipped a beat at the look. "Colette, Colette, Colette..." He wrapped his arms around her waist, pressing his face awkwardly into her stomach.

"W-what, Raj?" Colette stuttered out, lifting her arms away from the crazy man and looking to Penny for help. The girl just shrugged and laughed a bit.

"That song was for you..." He slurred out, the words muffled against her clothes.

"Yes, I assumed as much..." Colette said slowly. "Now, let's get you home before you pass out." She peeled his arms off of her waist, slinging one over her shoulder instead to support his weight as she escorted him to the door.

"I'm really, _really_ sorry," Raj slurred out, doing his best not to lean all his weight on the brunette, but succeeding in swaying more than necessary. Penny went ahead and hailed a taxi for them.

"I know you are," Colette said with a sigh. "Now, get in the cab." She helped Raj into the cab before climbing in after him, and Penny slid in last.

The three rode in silence, even after Raj had passed out. Penny helped carry the half-conscious Raj into the house, tossing him on the couch.

"I'll pay for the cab," Penny insisted, giving Colette a worried look. "You wanna stay at my place tonight?"

Colette sighed and looked at Raj, who groaned quietly and rolled over to an even less comfortable looking position.

"No," she said softly with a shake of her head. "I'll make sure he doesn't hurt himself or anything tonight."

"You sure?" Penny asked for clarification.

"Yeah, you go." She offered Penny a small smile and ushered her out the door. Once the blond was gone, Colette locked the door and let out a sigh. She turned back to the man on the couch, who was looking at her through half-lidded eyes, his hand on his forehead.

"I'm sorry I'm so stupid and useless," Raj groaned out, a frown apparent on his face. He sat up, his body swaying a bit.

"You're not..." Colette hesitated before going and sitting next to him. "You're not stupid and useless."

"Yes I am," Raj persisted, not turning to the girl. "I can't talk to girls without making myself into a drunk idiot, Howard is my only real friend, and... I'm just stupid and useless." He buried his face in his hands. It was silent for several seconds. Raj lifted his head, surprised at the lack of response, and came face-to-face with a glare from Colette.

"It's that sort of thinking that put you were you're at now," she scolded lightly. "Stop your complaining and self-loathing! If you want more friends, go out and make more friends. If you want to talk to girls, man up and do it! But don't try to make me pity your sorry ass because you can't get your own life together!"

Raj stared at her in surprise, not expecting such a response. "O-ok," he stuttered out. "I'm sorry..."

"Now, let's get you to bed." Colette still looked angry as she stood up, but it seemed to have subsided a lot after she finished her outburst. She grabbed Raj's arm and pulled him up, guiding him toward his room. She pushed him down on the bed, not even trying to be gentle with him any more, and, once he bounced a few times on his back, she lifted his legs and pulled off his shoes one at a time, followed by his pants and shirt, ignoring the embarrassment undressing Raj caused the both of them. She then grabbed the blankets and threw them over Raj, ignoring the curious look the man gave her. "Night," she breathed out before leaving the room, turning the lights off and shutting the door.

Raj stared at the door for several seconds, pulling the blanket up to partly cover his face. He wanted to go out there and apologize, but maybe it wasn't the best idea when he was still drunk. With a sigh, he let his heavy eyelids droop closed, falling into a deep slumber.

Colette stood outside the door for several seconds, reigning in her emotions as she took a deep, relaxing breath. She went through her nightly routine halfheartedly. She was really just going through the motions, knowing it would take her hours to get to sleep anyway.

Once she finished her usual routines, she snuggled into her spot on the couch, holding back the tears that threatened to spill.


End file.
